Twenty Twenty-One

Let’s be honest, the year 2021 started off pretty slow, kinda chill actually, then sis started swinging a few months in and just never stopped!! While taking a trip down memory lane as I unpacked this year, I found myself writing 5 whole pages in what was supposed to be a quick reflection. I’ve brought my biggest takeaways here to share from a year like no other, and I hope that what I’ve been through and learned will resonate with at least one other person. I also want to encourage you if this wasn’t the happiest year of your life, you’re not alone.

Put simply, this year was hard. Very hard honestly. A lot happened. A lot of life altering decisions and events took place. I spent a large amount of time on my own, fighting battles that only occurred behind closed doors or between my ears. I spent lots of time questioning things, asking questions I’ll never get the answers to. I also spent lots of quality time with people who mean the world to me. I got to reunite with friends from different walks of life for weddings, road trips, college reunions, and some circumstances not as ideal as others, but meaningful moments nonetheless.

I cried a lot. Like an embarrassing amount. For many reasons, such as moving from Pensacola and leaving the city I fell in love with behind, finishing up my time with the program and the athletes that are still so special to me, and well because I quite literally had no plan when I left there. I just packed up and drove west, barely able to see the road through the tears due to all the uncertainty in my life. That was quite the bold move by me. I also cried a lot because I experienced loss like I’ve never gone through before, and acquired a new lifelong partner-grief.

I learned a lot too. Quite literally because I finally graduated with my Masters in Public Health, so I’m like pretty smart now. But I also learned a great deal about life, all while knowing I still don’t really know anything. I learned about a new side of collegiate athletics, and that no matter what your involvement is in sports, it requires hard work and lots of time. On top of that, I relearned that relationships are the root of everything. Without them, it’s hard to find meaning in your day to day routine.

I figured out that it’s okay to not have it all figured out. Although it’s scary, terrifying actually, it’s okay to not have a plan. I mean heck, I lived with one of my best friends for the first 3 months in this new city (s/0), while using my car as a closet for the majority of that time. I dove into two new jobs that I had never done before, with people I didn’t know at all. Now I kind of know what I’m doing, and those people mean a lot to me. It was very unlike me to not have a set plan, but also very much like me to take the hardest route possible because I knew it’d help get me where I want to go.

This “time line” that we’re all supposed to be following or whatever is a whole bunch of nonsense. It doesn’t exist. There is no blue print for life, it’s not a one size fits all approach. Not everyone is going to reach the same milestones before the age of 25, and not all of us even have the same goals for our lives. Wherever you’re at in your own story or “time line” is unique because it’s your own. I have to remind myself constantly that I’m not behind, not a failure, and my life certainly isn’t any less significant because it looks different than others. That’s what makes it special, and that’s probably my greatest take away from the year 2021. That and the fact that life is short. It’s so very short, and even when it doesn’t feel like any of this matters, it all matters.

Whatever you experienced this past year, all the things you faced either privately or publicly, it matters. It’s all important in the story of your life, and it’s a different story than anyone else had this year. Take every ounce of these past 12 months with you moving forward, cherish the good and grow from the bad, and use it all as you continue to grow from this point on. I’m doing my best to practice that as well.

Lastly, don’t take life too seriously, and spend more time with the people who really matter to you. Your time is valuable, but it’s never wasted when spent with those you love.

Here’s to everyone in this new year of 2022, wishing nothing but good things, growth, and dad jokes in your every day. :)

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Reflecting on Life as a High School Athlete

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Room for Everyone